What Is a Graduate Couples Therapist? A Guide to Affordable and Supportive Relationship Care

You and your partner(s) want some support and you know it would be helpful to work with a couples and family therapist, but the fees are outside of your budget. There’s a reduced-rate couples counseling option you’ve considered. You booked a session with an “intern”, and even though you’re relieved to have something scheduled, you’re worried an intern might not be able to handle the kind of couples counseling you need.

Couples Counseling with a Marriage and Family Therapy Intern Graduate Student

Counseling with a graduate-level intern means your therapist is currently in school and undergoing intensive training to receive their diploma and licensure as a Marriage and Family Therapist. Many graduate school programs focus on symptoms, diagnoses, and symptom management and do not train in couples or relational counseling specifically.

Marriage and Family Therapists, MFTs, require training in systems theory. Marriage and Family Therapists and Interns in training are shown how to conceptualize all cases and see the world from the perspective of a larger system. Our work with clients requires that we see you in the context of your larger family system and notice how your family patterns have been recreated in the patterns you hold today. We take into account your personality and attachment style.

AAMFT Approved Supervisor Requirements

In order for a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist to become a qualified supervisor under our license in this field, we must be mentored and supervised by experienced MFTs who have taken a thirty-hour course and refreshers regularly that specifically teach us how to supervise other MFTs. This course is just as rigorous as graduate school. Other licenses do not require a specialized course for training in their license. MFTs are the only ones who have this type of specialty, and so all our Marriage and Family Therapists have been supervised for 1,500 hours by an American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy Approved Supervisor. As you can see, our MFT Interns are under the wings of highly trained, highly specialized systemic Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists. Our training centers on relational therapy and gives us much more in-depth perspectives for our couples and family work.

How Does Couples Counseling Work When Working with a Graduate-level Couples Therapist?

All MFT graduate students are taught how to create genograms with their clients. A genogram is like a family tree that shows relationships, diagnoses, alliances, cut-offs, tensions, and other relational dynamics in the family tree. We all start all our sessions by creating genograms with our clients. Genograms become important as a foundation when couples begin couples counseling with a Marriage and Family Therapist. Couples bring their entire family tree into counseling with them. Graduate Couples Therapists training to be Marriage and Family therapists use genograms to track systemic family patterns during sessions and use them to inform and mirror the couples in the room.

What You Get with a Graduate-Level Marriage and Family Therapist Intern

When you are working with your graduate-level MFT, you are being counseled by a lineage of MFT elders and all their wisdom. Each intern engages in multiple hours and forms of supervision. Not only is your MFT Intern receiving weekly individual supervision with an MFT professor at school along with group supervision with a professor and fellow MFT ’s-in-training, but they are also receiving multiple hours of weekly individual and group supervision from a seasoned therapist at the practice. Here at Spilove Psychotherapy, our supervisors are also receiving their own supervision of supervision. Most importantly to us, MFTs are required to do what we call “self of the therapist” work. This means that as part of our regular training and maintenance of being a therapist, we look at our own reactions and belief systems as they come up in our work with clients. Self-of-therapist requires that we each remain honest with ourselves and with our supervisors to notice if a client is triggering us or if we have a history of something that is coming up in our sessions. We, as MFTs, find this profoundly important because we want to make sure that our therapeutic container remains “clean” for our clients rather than having our own “stuff” get in the way or get mixed in with our interactions with clients. That’s a whole lot of therapist wisdom we’re bringing to the table here.

A Guide to Affordable and Supportive Relationship Care

If you’re interested in working with an affordable and supportive couples counselor for relationship care, consider the training your counselor has or is going through. You might want to make sure that your counselor is specifically trained in couples and relational therapy. Here are some questions you might want to ask before booking a session in Philadelphia, Bryn Mawr or Online in Pennsylvania

• Is my counselor or intern specifically trained in couples counseling?

• Has my intern or therapist learned about systems theory?

• What models of couples counseling does this therapist use?

• How often does my intern receive supervision?

• Is my intern supervisor trained in systems or couples counseling?

• Does my therapist do their own “self of the therapist” work?

These questions should help you get a sense of the quality and types of training the therapist you’re working with has received or is receiving.

Our Approach At Spilove Psychotherapy

Here at Spilove Psychotherapy, we are excited to work with two Marriage and Family Therapy Interns from Thomas Jefferson University starting in 2025 for 16 months! Antoinette and Blythe have already started their orientation and will be directly supervised by Dr. Gwenn Swift, LMFT for multiple hours per week. As Clinical Director and Owner of Spilove Psychotherapy, I will also be providing oversight and supervision both to the interns and to Gwenn. Furthermore, our highly experienced long-term couples therapist, Yolanda Cucinotta, is also a Marriage and Family therapist. As you can see, our MFT interns hold long legacies of many other MFTs and benefit from our collective wisdom. Quite frankly, there is really never another time that any therapist has this much clinical support as they do during their MFT graduate internship. It's a truly enriching and unique experience for both the client and the intern.

If you’d like to learn more about our internship program or book your free consultation call for couples counseling in Philadelphia, Bryn Mawr or online in Pennsylvania, click the button below.

Discover Affordable, High-Quality Couples Counseling

Finding a couples counselor who fits your needs and budget can be challenging. At Spilove Psychotherapy, our Marriage and Family Therapy Interns offer a unique blend of affordability, rigorous training, and compassionate care. Backed by a team of highly trained supervisors, our interns bring the expertise of systemic therapy into every session, helping you and your partner navigate challenges with confidence.

• Schedule a free consultation here so we can get to know your story.

• Explore more about couples therapy by reading our blogs.

• Start your journey towards a fulfilling relationship with a couples therapist!

Other Therapy Services We Offer in Pennsylvania

In addition to our focus on couples therapy, our skilled therapists offer a variety of other mental health services. These include Ketamine-assisted Psychotherapy, LGBTQIA+ therapy, and treatment for eating disorders. We also provide specialized play therapy for children, EMDR therapy, and trauma intensives.

Our qualified therapists conduct DBT skills groups as well.

If life coaching is more suited to your needs than traditional therapy, we provide in-person life coaching in Pennsylvania and online services across the US.

Why ADHD Often Goes Undiagnosed in Women

By Emma Stein, MS, NCE

ADHD, Therapy, Feminist Theory, Women in Therapy, Online Therapy, ADHD Therapy, Telemedicine, Trauma Therapy

ADHD in Women, Bryn Mawr and Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition often associated with hyperactive boys struggling to sit still in school. For decades, this stereotypical image has overshadowed the diverse ways ADHD presents, particularly in women. As a result, many women go undiagnosed well into adulthood, often grappling with feelings of inadequacy, shame, and exhaustion without understanding why. This disparity in diagnosis stems from a complex interplay of gender norms, societal expectations, and the unique ways ADHD manifests in women.

The consequences of undiagnosed ADHD in women are profound, impacting mental health, relationships, and career success. Women with ADHD frequently develop coping mechanisms that mask their struggles, inadvertently making the condition harder to identify. By understanding these nuances, we can work toward a more equitable recognition of ADHD across genders and ensure that no one suffers in silence.

The Gender Gap in ADHD Awareness

For much of its history, ADHD research has focused on boys, and only boys. Early studies were conducted predominantly with male subjects, leading to diagnostic criteria that emphasized symptoms more commonly seen in boys, such as hyperactivity and impulsivity. This narrow framework left out subtler presentations, often seen in girls and women, such as inattentiveness, emotional dysregulation, and internalized struggles.

Girls with ADHD are more likely to exhibit symptoms like daydreaming, forgetfulness, or sensitivity to criticism—traits that are often misinterpreted as laziness, disorganization, or moodiness. These behaviors are less disruptive than hyperactive outbursts, making them less likely to draw attention from teachers, parents, or even healthcare professionals.

This gap in understanding persists into adulthood, where women are frequently misdiagnosed with other mental health disorders. While these conditions may coexist with ADHD, they often overshadow the root cause, leading to ineffective treatments and ongoing distress. The world likes to create boxes, the box for ADHD was created on its presentation in men and now Women do not fit into it. 

The Masking Effect in ADHD

Women with ADHD often develop sophisticated coping mechanisms to compensate for their struggles. They may become perfectionists, overachievers, or chronic people-pleasers, working tirelessly to meet societal expectations. These strategies can provide short-term relief but come at the cost of significant emotional and mental fatigue. We work extremely hard to fit in while fighting internally to regulate and function at the level that we are expected to. 

The effort to appear "normal" often leads to burnout, as we push ourselves to keep up with our neurotypical peers. This masking behavior can be particularly pronounced in environments that demand high levels of organization and multitasking, such as the workplace or home.

For mothers, the challenges of undiagnosed ADHD are compounded by the pressures of parenting. Women are often expected to manage household responsibilities, nurture children, and maintain social connections—all tasks that can be especially overwhelming for someone with ADHD. When they struggle, they may internalize blame, believing they are simply not trying hard enough.

Societal Expectations and Gender Norms in ADHD

Cultural norms around gender roles further complicate the recognition of ADHD in women. From an early age, girls are often socialized to be quiet, cooperative, and attentive, masking behaviors that might otherwise signal ADHD. A girl who struggles to focus in class may be labeled as inattentive or unmotivated rather than considered for an ADHD diagnosis. How many girls do you know, if you are not one yourself, that got “talks a lot” on their report cards in school? How about “does really great in school but struggles with transitions?” These are some common symptoms that become normal in the classroom due to societal expectations. 

In adulthood, these expectations shift but remain restrictive. Women are expected to be organized, nurturing, and emotionally stable—all areas where ADHD can present challenges. The societal pressure to meet these standards can lead women to hide their struggles, further delaying diagnosis and treatment.

These cultural pressures can also affect how women perceive themselves. Many women with ADHD report feeling like they are failing at life, unable to meet the demands of work, relationships, or family. This internalized sense of inadequacy often exacerbates anxiety and depression, creating a vicious cycle that obscures the underlying ADHD.

How ADHD Manifests Differently in Women

The presentation of ADHD in women is often nuanced, with symptoms that diverge from the traditional understanding of the disorder. While men and boys with ADHD are more likely to exhibit externalized behaviors such as hyperactivity and impulsivity, women are more likely to internalize their struggles.

Inattentiveness is a hallmark of ADHD in women, manifesting as forgetfulness, difficulty staying organized, or losing track of time. Women with ADHD may also experience intense emotional responses, such as heightened sensitivity to criticism or overwhelming feelings of frustration.

Another trademark is always being busy and never having enough time. The one friend that is always running late because they are coming from another plan, the person who has started 5 different hobbies and not completed one to the end. 

Additionally, the hormonal fluctuations associated with menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause can exacerbate ADHD symptoms. Many women first notice their struggles intensify during these times, prompting them to seek help. Unfortunately, because ADHD is still under-recognized in women, they may not receive an accurate diagnosis.

The Consequences of Late Diagnosis of ADHD

For women who go undiagnosed until adulthood, the impact can be life-altering. Without understanding their condition, many women develop unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as avoidance, substance use, or excessive reliance on others for support.

Undiagnosed ADHD can strain relationships, as partners or family members may misinterpret symptoms as laziness, disinterest, or irresponsibility. At work, women with ADHD may struggle with deadlines, organization, or maintaining focus, leading to missed opportunities and underachievement despite their potential.

Perhaps most troubling is the toll undiagnosed ADHD takes on mental health. Women with ADHD are significantly more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem, often stemming from years of feeling "different" or "not good enough." Recognizing and treating ADHD can be a transformative step toward breaking this cycle and reclaiming self-worth.

Moving Forward: Addressing the Gender Disparity in ADHD

To close the gender gap in ADHD diagnosis, we need to challenge outdated stereotypes and broaden our understanding of the disorder. This starts with education—ensuring that teachers, parents, and healthcare providers recognize the diverse ways ADHD can present.

Women and girls who suspect they may have ADHD should feel empowered to seek evaluation without fear of stigma. Raising awareness about the condition, especially its underdiagnosis in women, is essential for creating an environment where individuals feel supported and understood.

Additionally, healthcare providers must adopt a more holistic approach to diagnosis and treatment, considering how ADHD interacts with other conditions and life circumstances. Screening for ADHD in women with anxiety, depression, or other mood disorders can help uncover the root cause of their struggles and lead to more effective interventions.

For women living with ADHD, finding a supportive community can make all the difference. Connecting with others who share similar experiences can provide validation, encouragement, and practical advice for managing symptoms.

ADHD in women is often invisible, hidden behind societal expectations, coping mechanisms, and misdiagnoses. The journey to diagnosis can be long and challenging, but understanding and awareness are growing.

By recognizing the unique ways ADHD manifests in women and addressing the barriers to diagnosis, we can ensure that no one is left struggling in silence. For women with ADHD, the path to self-discovery and empowerment begins with a simple truth: you are not alone, and your challenges do not define your worth.

To book a free initial consultation for therapy in Bryn Mawr, Philadelphia or Online throughout Pennsylvania and New Jersey, contact us here.

Emma Stein, MS, NCE

Clinical Specialist

About The Author

Emma Stein is a Villanova Graduate with a Master of Science in Counseling. She specializes in sports related anxiety, body image, borderline personality disorder, PTSD, LGBTQ populations, Inner Child work and Women with ADHD. Her approach is grounded in feminist theory and she loves helping her clients to challenge societal exceptions and embrace their full identities.

To learn more or to schedule an initial intake call for therapy in Bryn Mawr or online in Pennsylvania, click the button below.

Balancing Parenthood and Partnership: Low-Fee Counseling for Overwhelmed Couples

By Emma Stein, MS, NCE

Couples Counseling, Parenthood, Partnership, Low-Fee, Budget, Therapy, Balance, Low-Budget, Relational Counseling, Accessible, Communication, Telemedicine

Parenthood is a journey filled with joy, challenges, and endless growth. From sleepless nights with newborns to navigating a teenager’s world, the demands of raising children can feel all-consuming, and sometimes it is. Amid this whirlwind, it's easy for the foundation of a partnership to get lost. The emotional connection between partners can fade under the weight of responsibilities, leaving both feeling overwhelmed and disconnected.

The Impact of Parenthood on Relationships

Parenthood changes everything—your schedules, priorities, and even the way you see yourself and your partner. Sleep deprivation, financial stress, and the constant juggling of work and family can lead to miscommunication and tension. Intimacy may take a back seat, and small conflicts can escalate into larger issues if left unresolved. The child becomes the focus and both you and your relationship take the back seat. 

The balance of having just the two of you is no longer there and you are left drowning in a sea of overwhelm. There are things that must get done and not enough time in the day to do them, and the stress and frustration fall onto the back of the relationship. You and your partner are lost in the grind, and the intimacy you once felt is also gone. How to get it all back without adding more to your already full plate? 

To Book your free consultation call for couples counseling in Bryn Mawr, Philadelphia, or online in Pennsylvania or New Jersey, click the button below:

Finding the Balance

Striking a balance between parenthood and partnership doesn’t happen automatically—it requires effort, planning, and compromise. Here are key aspects of finding equilibrium:

1. Time Together as a Couple.

   • It’s easy to put your relationship on the back burner when kids demand so much attention, but carving out time for one another is essential. Schedule regular date nights or even brief check-ins to reconnect emotionally.

2. Teamwork in Parenting.

   • Approach parenting as a team rather than as individuals operating in separate spheres. This means sharing responsibilities, supporting each other in decision-making, and presenting a united front to your children.

3. Individual Self-Care.

   • Both partners need space to recharge individually. By taking care of your own well-being, you can show up as your best self for both your partner and your children.

4. Setting Boundaries.

   • Learn to set boundaries that protect your partnership, such as limiting work hours or scheduling family time. Healthy boundaries teach children the importance of balance and respect for relationships.

5. Communication.

   • Open, honest, and respectful communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. Make it a habit to share your thoughts, concerns, and appreciation with your partner.

The Role of Couples Counseling in Bryn Mawr, PA

Is counseling right for your relationship? Can taking an hour a week to work on the partnership really make a difference?

Couples counseling at Spilove provides a neutral, supportive environment for couples to address their concerns, improve communication, and build resilience together.

A couples therapist can help you:

• Identify and address recurring conflicts. Recognizing patterns that lead to arguments can help couples break cycles of negativity.

• Improve communication skills. Learning how to express needs and listen actively can transform the way partners connect.

• Reignite emotional and physical intimacy. Couples therapists can guide couples toward rediscovering the closeness that brought them together in the first place.

• Navigate parenting as a team. Collaborative approaches to parenting foster unity and reduce stress.

Counseling can help you seek a balance that works for your relationship and parenting needs. There is no one-size-fits-all for parenting or partnership tips. It is truly about what works best for you and your partner, working with a counselor can help you navigate the challenges of finding a balance between partnership and parenting. 

Rekindling Intimacy

One of the most significant casualties of parenthood can be intimacy—both emotional and physical. It’s not uncommon for couples to feel distant or “out of sync” as they focus on their roles as parents. However, intimacy is vital to maintaining a strong, healthy relationship.

1. Emotional Intimacy.

   • Emotional intimacy involves feeling connected, valued, and understood by your partner. This requires trust and vulnerability, which can be cultivated through regular, meaningful conversations. Take time to ask each other open-ended questions, share your feelings, and actively listen without judgment.

2. Physical Intimacy.

   • Parenthood often leaves little time or energy for physical connection, but even small gestures—holding hands, cuddling on the couch, or giving each other a quick hug—can make a difference. Remember, intimacy doesn’t have to involve grand gestures. Regular, intentional moments of affection can reignite the spark in your relationship.

3. Prioritizing Intimacy.

   • Schedule time for intimacy the same way you would for other important activities. While it may feel unromantic to plan for it, being intentional ensures that it doesn’t get overlooked. Consider creating rituals, like having coffee together in the morning or a tech-free hour before bedtime, to foster connection.

4. Addressing Barriers to Intimacy.

   • Stress, exhaustion, and unresolved conflicts can all create barriers to intimacy. Couples counseling can help couples identify and address these issues, creating space for reconnection.

The Accessibility of Low-Fee Counseling

Many couples hesitate to seek help due to financial concerns. Low-fee counseling programs, often offered by nonprofit organizations, universities, or community centers, provide affordable solutions. These programs typically feature services delivered by graduate-level counseling interns under the supervision of licensed professionals.

Low-fee counseling not only makes support accessible but also reduces the stigma often associated with seeking help. When counseling is framed as an essential investment in the family’s well-being rather than a luxury, couples are more likely to prioritize it.

A Strong Partnership is Worth the Investment

Balancing parenthood and partnership is no small feat, but it’s one of the most rewarding endeavors a couple can undertake. Seeking counseling isn’t a sign of failure—it’s a courageous step toward creating a healthier, happier home for everyone involved.

Low-fee counseling programs ensure that no family has to choose between financial stability and emotional well-being. With the right support, overwhelmed couples can move from simply surviving to truly thriving together.

If you’ve been putting off seeking help, now is the time to act. Your relationship—and your family’s future—deserve it.

Reignite Your Connection: Strengthening Your Relationship Through Parenthood’s Challenges

Parenthood brings endless joys but can also shift the focus away from your partnership. With Spilove Psychotherapy, you can reconnect, strengthen your bond, and rediscover the love that brought you together. Take the first step toward a healthier, happier relationship. Together, we can help your relationship thrive, for you and your family!

• Schedule a free consultation here so we can get to know your story.

• Explore more about couples therapy by reading our blogs.

• Start your journey toward a more connected and fulfilling relationship.

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About The Author

Emma Stein, MS, NCE

Clinical Specialist

Emma Stein is a Villanova Graduate with a Master of Science in Counseling. She specializes in sports-related anxiety, body image, borderline personality disorder, PTSD, LGBTQ populations, Inner Child work and Women with ADHD. Her approach is grounded in feminist theory and she loves helping her clients to challenge societal exceptions and embrace their full identities.

To learn more or to schedule an initial intake call for therapy in Bryn Mawr or online in Pennsylvania, click the button below.

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Other Therapy Services We Offer in Pennsylvania

In addition to our focus on couples therapy, our skilled therapists offer a variety of other mental health services. These include Ketamine-assisted Psychotherapy, LGBTQIA+ therapy, and trauma therapy. We also provide specialized play therapy for children.

Our couples therapists conduct DBT skills groups as well.

If life coaching is more suited to your needs than traditional therapy, we provide in-person life coaching in Pennsylvania and online services across the US.

7 Signs It’s Time to Seek Couples Therapy (and How to Do It on a Budget)

1. The long road: couples who have history need support

You and your partner have been together for a while. You’ve made it through some life transitions, some struggles, joys, and celebrations. You know each other well. You make a great team and yet you miss the days when your relationship was new and exciting. Maybe you have kids or you’re about to. Maybe you’ve decided not to become parents. Wherever your marriage or your partnership has been, it now feels a little lonely, a little stale. You want the deep intimacy again. Couples therapy is for you. Here, at Spilove, we know how to help you and your partner to reconnect and breathe life into your marriage or relationship.  

Contact us here to schedule a free consultation for couples counseling in Bryn Mawr, Philadelphia, and online across Pennsylvania and New Jersey.

2. The New Relationship: for couples who are just starting to find their flow

You found a great match!  It’s fun and exciting.  You’ve gotten to know each other for a while and your heart is in this one.  There’s so much about this relationship that works for you and you’re excited to see it unfold.  Unfortunately, you’re noticing that you and your partner are getting triggered quite often. Feelings get hurt.  There’s some blame and insecurities arising. You know you care deeply for this person, but you’re starting to feel tangled in some baggage that may not belong to this particular relationship, and yet it is impacting you both. If things continue, you worry the relationship won’t make it.  You want this to work and yet, you seem to keep getting stuck in each other’s wounds.  
Our couples’ counselors specialize in working with attachment wounds. We are trained and skilled in helping couples unpack the nuances that trigger trauma wounds and impact relationships. Together, we will help you and your partner to create safety in your relationship and build trust in yourselves and in one another.

Contact us here to schedule an initial consultation in Bryn Mawr, Philadelphia, and online through Pennsylvania and New Jersey

3. Couples going through life changes and premarital counseling

You have a solid relationship with your partner, but now things are different.  Maybe you just had a baby, just got married, just moved in together, started a new job, or had a loss.  Life is not the same as it was before and you want your relationship to be the solid foundation for you both as you navigate this new phase of life. Here at Spilove, we can help you process the new role you’re in and how you’d like your life to look in this new chapter.  

4. Now we’re lopsided and we want to stay on the same page: when one member of a partnership is doing their own growth - how to stay together 

You’ve known your trauma has impacted your partnership.  Perhaps you came together through a trauma bond. You were in it together and faced the world together through the lens of difficulty. But you’ve grown now. You have a different perspective and you’ve done your healing work.  The work seems to have put a wedge between you and your partner and you don’t want to leave them behind.  You worry if you don’t get support for your relationship, you might not stay together.  You’d like your partner to do their own work and to be able to be on the same page. Couples counseling can help your relationship to expand so that it can hold the new version of yourself now that you’ve healed some of your wounds. Couples can be helpful for your partner to support you and for you to be able to bring support to your partner.  Together, we can work so that the “we” can best support the individual “I” of the relationship and so that the “I” can support the “we”.  

To learn more and book your free initial consultation in Bryn Mawr, Philadelphia, and online throughout Pennsylvania and New Jersey, click the button below to book your intro call.

5. Boundaries! Our relationship needs support around boundaries

You were raised with enmeshment, not much individuation between you and others. And you realize that you’ve built this relationship based on enmeshment. It worked for a while, but you realize how important it is to individuate. You need some breathing room in the relationship and also with your family and in-laws. You want some space, but you want to maintain your relationship. It’s been difficult to change the original way you entered in.  If you don’t get support, you worry that you’ll continue to argue with your partner.  You would like some assistance with boundaries for the health of all of your relationships and you’d like to start with your most central connection - to your partner.  

As couples therapists, we know how to help. 

6. When your relationship is in trouble: stone walling and the other horsemen of the apocalypse 

It’s been rough!  You don’t even know if you like your partner anymore. You feel resentment, animosity, and sometimes hatred. You remember a time when you had deep affection, but at this point, you can’t access compassion.  Your home has become a silent battleground that explodes from time to time.  You’re tired of the tension, but neither of you can put down the fight.  If you don’t get support, you will continue in the land of silent scorn and you may need to start the divorce process. No one should have to live like this.  Contact us here to get a free initial consultation for couples counseling.

7. Are we poly? Is opening our relationship right for us? 

You’ve been talking to your partner about practicing Ethical Non Monogamy (ENM). You are interested and excited but want to make sure you’re considering the implications.  You’ve read some books, watched some of your friends open their relationships and you’d like to have a safe space to sort out the boundaries, the emotions and ensure the connection between your primary partner(s).  Relational therapy is a great place to create safety, open communication and sort through the many considerations for changing the monogamous relationship dynamic.  

Contact us here for more information about reduced-rate couples counseling with our Jefferson University Interns.  We have offices in Bryn Mawr, Center City, Philadelphia on Rittenhouse Square and we offer online telehealth therapy virtually throughout Pennsylvania and New Jersey.  Click the button below to book your free initial intake call.

Reignite Connection, Build Trust, and Grow Together with Couples Counseling

No matter where your relationship stands—whether you're navigating life transitions, rekindling intimacy, setting healthy boundaries, or exploring new dynamics—our skilled couples therapists at Spilove are here to support you. Together, we’ll help you and your partner create safety, rebuild trust, and strengthen your connection.

1. Schedule a free consultation here so we can get to know your story.

2. Explore more about couples therapy by reading our blogs.

3. Start your journey toward a more connected and fulfilling relationship.

Other Therapy Services We Offer in Pennsylvania

In addition to our focus on couples therapy, our skilled therapists offer a variety of other mental health services. These include Ketamine-assisted Psychotherapy, LGBTQIA+ therapy, and treatment for eating disorders. We also provide specialized play therapy for children.

Our qualified therapists conduct DBT skills groups as well.

If life coaching is more suited to your needs than traditional therapy, we provide in-person life coaching in Pennsylvania and online services across the US.

Black and White Thinking in the Post Election Era - And the Mindset of Healing

By Emma Stein, MS, NCE

You are feeling stuck post-election, you are full of emotions and unsure where to turn. You find your thoughts are racing and there is no stop. You have a lump in your throat that won’t go away. The tightness in your chest has been there for weeks. Your stomach is in knots. Where is this coming from and when will it stop? 

Black and White Thinking

Black and white thinking, an all or nothing mindset, could be playing a huge role in your post-election processing. Black and white thinking is a cognitive pattern that puts your worldview into a binary, things exist as good or bad. What does black and white thinking sound like? Using phrases such as always, never, impossible, ruined, perfect, and so many more. The instant idealizing or catastrophizing of any situation. Our brains form polarized traps into a thinking pattern that doesn’t allow our thoughts and emotions to exist outside of one context and our bodies react to it. Our minds can take one experience, one message, and throw it all the way to one end of the binary. For example, you make a mistake, black and white thinking turns that into “I always make mistakes and I will never be good at this task.” Is this the truth? Or is the truth that we are human and we make mistakes? Will you make the same mistake again? Will you be good at this task next week? Likely the answer is that you do not always make mistakes, and you will be good at that task over time, that is the box that black and white thinking puts us in. This then leads to negative thinking spirals that make us feel stuck, make our thoughts race, make our bodies react, and so much more. 

Post Election Anxiety

What does this look like in the post-election era? We are often shocked, scared, and confused when we are forced to see that other people do not think the same way as us. We are often thinking of all the worst case scenarios and hurting for the people it impacts. We are hurt by the people who allowed this to happen. We are angry that the world could be such a negative place. All of those things are okay, it is when they become consuming and no other thoughts can hold space that we begin to polarize our minds. We begin to catastrophize, we begin to only see the world as bad. We latch onto the pain and it takes over. The doom sets in. You can be angry, hurt, disappointed, distraught, but allowing those emotions to create a sense of hopelessness can completely take over both our thoughts and our bodies. Our brain can only see the dread and our body holds on to it. So we can be scared and confused, we can be angry at the results, without allowing our brains to fall into the trap of this will never change and things will never improve. 

If you’d like to book your free initial intake call for counseling in Bryn Mawr, Philadelphia or online in Pennsylvania or New Jersey, click the button below:

Two Things Can Be True: DBT Skills

Try settling into using the word and. Multiple things can be true at one time, and teaching our brain to allow this is crucial in creating a mental space of safety. Healing from the emotional dysregulation from the election looks like allowing your feelings to exist and grounding yourself in the present moment. Healing looks like being angry and upset while also finding ways to practice self-care and bring you little glimmers each day. Figuring out the things that still bring you joy and continuing to create space for them. Healing looks like allowing multiple things to be true at the same time so your brain does not get stuck into a polarized thinking trap and you do not lose yourself in your black and white thinking. For the election, can we be angry, disappointed, and upset AND recognize there are still things we can do to take a stand and help support ourselves and those around us. 

When your friends or loved ones voted in a way that feels unsafe

Think about the people who voted for the other party, black and white thinking looks like belittling and vilifying them. Healing looks like understanding a sense of common humanity, no matter how misguided and unjustified you find their vote; creating an enemy out of them allows the anger to continue to build and the polarized thinking patterns to continue to spiral. Now by no means am I suggesting going to make them your best friend, but walking away from the thinking patterns of bad and good. It may sound like “I do not agree with who you voted for and the principles they ran on AND I do not need to hold on the hostility that I am holding towards you, you are not worth my time and energy.”

Post Election Doom Spirals

In this post-election era it is easy to fall into the doom spiral, it is easy to see all the ways this election is negatively impacting others and it is much harder to pull ourselves out of it. Black and white thinking puts us in a box, think about opening the box and trying to see things from multiple perspectives. Where can I find the and? What can I do to create space for the emotion and the healing? Look at the image below, which word do you see? 

Post Election Good and Evil

Can you see the good AND the evil? In many senses this is true of the world, there can be both good and evil at the same time. The key is allowing both of them to exist in the context of each other without allowing one or the other to become too overbearing. Now maybe you cannot find anything good about the election, this is where we circle back to where you can look to create your own sense of joy, your own glimmer of hope. Find moments where you can do something that allows that lump in your throat to go away for a little while, let the tightness in your chest relax, let your stomach relax. You do not need to forget, you do not need to let it go, you need to be able to put it down when it becomes too much. 

Black and White Thinking is a Trauma Response

There is no way to predict the future, black and white thinking is based in the reality of creating a concrete future before there is one. Try and stay in the moment, ground yourself in the present and look for all the places you can find the and. 

To learn more or to book your free into call for therapy in Bryn Mawr, Philadelphia or online in Pennsylvania or New Jersey, click the button below:

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About The Author

Emma Stein is a Villanova Graduate with a Master of Science in Counseling. She specializes in sports related anxiety, body image, borderline personality disorder, PTSD, LGBTQ populations, Inner Child work and Women with ADHD. Her approach is grounded in feminist theory and she loves helping her clients to challenge societal exceptions and embrace their full identities.

To learn more or to schedule an initial intake call for therapy in Bryn Mawr or online in Pennsylvania, click the button below.

Finding the Right Path: Exploring Traditional Therapy, KAP & Trauma Intensives

You’ve been around the block a few times. You know how to do therapy. You enjoy it. You like the self-exploration and the connection with your therapist. You’ve benefited from therapy and you want to continue to delve deeper and reshape some of the patterns you’ve found but haven’t been able to access. You’re wondering what the best approach is for you.

Traditional Therapy

When you hear traditional therapy, several things may come to mind. Perhaps you think about lying on a couch and free-associating like Freud proposed in psychoanalysis. Maybe you are more intrigued by the mysticism, symbolism, and spiritual connectedness that Carl Jung taught in depth psychology. The vastness of the exploration pulls you and you’d like weekly sessions to go deep for a long period of time.

Perhaps you are looking for something more practical like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. You’re looking to understand your behaviors, learn tools and affirmations to change your mind. You’re not interested in going too deep into your past. You want some practical skills to bring into your life to help you regulate and know how to engage with others. Or perhaps you’ve learned these skills and tools and you’re wanting something more direct with the ability to deeply heal the wounds you carry around.

At Spilove Psychotherapy we meet you where you’re at and help you see yourself and your patterns from a compassionate lens. We often utilize trauma reprocessing and reshaping approaches such as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Internal Family Systems (IFS), Attachment Wounding Repair, Inner Child Work, and Somatic Approaches. Many of our weekly sessions facilitate you through these methods to connect into yourself, find the places you’d like to shift, and help you to reshape your patterns into ones that hold the most integrity for you. Our traditional therapy methods are broken out into weekly, consistent sessions and we build with you, over time across your daily life.

To learn more about our traditional weekly therapy sessions in Bryn Mawr, Philadelphia, and Online throughout the state of Pennsylvania and New Jersey, contact us here.

Ketamine Assisted Psychotherapy (KAP)

Ketamine Assisted Psychotherapy brings the medical world, the psychotherapy world, and the mystical realms together for deep exploration and swift results. It can be done in the context of traditional weekly sessions over an extended period of time, it can be more intensive with 2 sessions per week and it can also be done in the context of a trauma intensive where a finite amount of time is blocked off for an outpatient experience with a rigorous inpatient model of momentum. Suppose you have been working on resolving trauma and you’ve been feeling challenged to get at the root of the issues. In that case, Ketamine Assisted Psychotherapy might be something you’re interested in learning more about. Many of our clients have very long-standing very complex PTSD, often with complicated comorbid conditions. Our clients are motivated and show up to regular weekly therapy, ready to face their trauma.

Is KAP for you?

If you’re wondering if KAP might be right for you, here’s something to consider. We can help you to create safety and foster your therapeutic relationship so that you can feel comfortable allowing us into your inner worlds to help you unravel the patterns that wrap around your trauma. You’ve given it your all and even then, many patterns are created to keep you and the people around you away from your tender wounds. Here’s an example of how KAP can bring you to deeper healing:

Jessica has a history of childhood trauma and her system learned how to cope through binging, purging and eventually restricting her food. It’s been 20 years since that pattern was necessary for her to feel agency or mastery in her life, but she continues to restrict because when she eats, she has body memories of her childhood trauma. She’s talked about the trauma in weekly sessions, she’s talked about the food, she’s talked about it all and she wants to eat, but it feels like she can’t. With the use of Ketamine Assisted Psychotherapy, she was able to see herself go back in time to the age when she experienced the trauma that created her food patterns. Using the Ketamine, she was able to connect back to that part of herself without being pushed out by the fear, the terror, the body memories, the freeze and shut down responses. In KAP Jessica spent time with her inner child at various ages and gave her younger self the internal care she needed at that age. She used KAP to tell herself that the memories are in the past and that no one can hurt her in the present. Through KAP she discussed ways she would like to start caring for herself differently and ways that she could tend to those younger parts in her everyday life. The process was similar to traditional therapy, but it was easier to access the younger parts on Ketamine. After several sessions, Jessica started being able to eat and reshaped her body memories. She practiced feeling the body sensations during her KAP sessions and paired that experience with relaxation, safety and self love. Eventually her system created new patterning so that the triggers subsided and she could enjoy food without the inner critic voices inside. This case example is possible to do without Ketamine, but it takes longer and there’s more resistance from the internal systems so the KAP experiences made it easier and swifter. If this experience sounds like something you’d like to learn more about or try for your own specific patterning, contact us and we can walk you through the process.

We provide KAP sessions for people in Bryn Mawr and Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Click here to book your intake.

Trauma Intensives

If you want a kick start or a head start or if you don’t have the time to commit to weekly therapy sessions and you’d like to jump into your trauma work for a finite amount of time, trauma intensives might be for you. In our trauma intensives we use several trauma resolution modalities and sometimes KAP to help our clients dive into their trauma resolution work and come out recalibrated and more integrated then when they began. If you already have a therapist, but you want to go deeper faster, you might consider a trauma intensive. If you’ve been doing pretty well but want to address those patterns you haven’t been able to access before, you might like the intensive format. If you have a busy schedule and you can take a week off but not weekly for an hour, trauma intensives can help with that. People just starting off their journey might like this boost and people well into their journey like it for different reasons.

Weather you want weekly or inteisves, only you know the best fit for your needs and we trust your choices. Agency and your own choice, education and your relationship between you and your therapist are of paramount importance. If you’re uncertain where you land, contact us and we will be happy to walk you through your specific and unique needs and your various options. We wish you luck and look forward to meeting you on your road.

Sincerely,

The Spilove Psychotherapy Team